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The Myth About Women Raising Sons

Updated: Feb 7, 2020

Can a woman raise a son without a Man?


The Myth about Women Raising Sons


How many times have we heard the premise spoken…”A Woman cannot raise a son without a Man”. STOPPPPP WOMEN!!! Before you start throwing High heel shoes. Let’s be civil about this matter (for a moment). Before I go any further we may have to start a “Go Fund Me” fundraiser to pay for the cost of the postage to mail out letters to all the single black moms who are raising Young Black sons. It is quite apparent that somebody failed to get the memo that they couldn’t do this.


Why didn’t we tell Barak Obamas Mom she couldn’t raise a President or Denzel’s mom she could raise a Leading man or Sean Puffy Combs Mom she couldn't raise a Business Mogul. How dare they have the audacity to raise successful black men without the presence of a father in the home.


Every time I hear these words spoken I can also hear the sound of Black mothers who have gone on before us, rolling in their graves. The statement makes me feel like I’ve just been run over by a hypothetical assumption far from a truth too many women are living every day. The facts of this matter have been evidenced in multiple studies. According to the US Census Bureau, 19.7 million children which equates to 1 in 4, live without a father in the home.


So, what happens to that 1 who is fatherless? Does he just die? Of course, the odds are against him but if he has a mother she can certainly be more than the world can be against him. Though my demeanor and persona tend to be pretty tranquil, the premise that a woman cannot raise a son alone grates my nerves.


Somebody, please tell me…WHY CAN'T SHE DO THIS?? Is it for emotional reasons? What woman can’t show a man how to express his emotions. Remember, you said women talk too much so if he is raised by a talkative woman he just might learn to open up and express what he is feeling. Is it for physical reasons? What mom can’t pass the potty training test. Is it for spiritual reasons? We don’t even have to check in with the Census Bureau for the stats. It's plain to see the number of women in Church far out weight the men. We want the men to be the spiritual leader in the home but in their absence, the mom takes on this role time and time again.


Am I saying a boy never needs a man in his life? ABSOLUTELY NOT. If I could wave a preverbial magic “Daddy’s Home” wand I would wave it over all 19.7 million fatherless homes. It is always a blessing when a father steps up to the plate and meets his responsibilities as a father. So let me right now commend those who have. “THANK YOU FATHERS”. But what I am saying is let us not negate the work done by the very present moms in an effort to fulfill the task of the absent father.


Raising children is no joke and I commend every mother who is playing a dual role in this Act of Life.




Pat Martin Speaks



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